Catastrophise

I planted a tree a couple of days ago
A Silver Birch
My wife’s favourite
It was in the ground
and looking good
Without warning
My back just seized
Oh shit
Here we go again
Pain starts immediately 
And the darkness sneaks in
Why did I bother i think
I’ll never see the tree grown
Never sit in its shade
Never get to walk by 
Touch the trunk
Feel the leaves
I spent the next few days inside
With my laptop
Pages open for scrutiny
Wheelchairs
Walking aides
Retirement homes
In-home nursing

(The trees goal is clear
Grow tall and offer its shade
Fear consumed my life)

My wife continues
To water the tree
And love me
Even though I often tend
To catastrophise.

Decisions

Some choices are black and white

And yet I always add the grey.

Before I know it –

All the colours bloom.

Reds, greens and sometimes blue,

And I’ve put it off –

Until another sunrise.

Maybe then, in black and white.

Tangled

 

 

Another Day

 I met a man upon the beach
 One steamy summer morn'.
 He was quiet and calm,
 And as we stood and watched -
 Another day was born.


 As the first rays touch our chests
 I turned to look at him once more.
 His hair was long,
 His feet were bare,
 His robes were wet and worn.


 He turned to me a gaze that pierced,
 Then filled me with content.
 His eyes were deep
 His face was calm
 His soul was on display.


 He invited me to share repast
 We sat and watched the rising sun -
 And ate his fish
 And ate his bread
 And drank no finer brew.


 Conversation flowed with ease
 As if brought upon the gentle breeze
 We spoke of things
 That summer dawn
 Which calmed my jagged mind.


 I walk that beach now ev'ry day
 And feel the same sweet peace -
 As nature flows
 And the ocean sighs
 And seabirds eulogise.